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This is a beach that spans multiple autobiographies, and ghosts scenes from my past that are etched in my usually noncapacious memory. Here first are the snapshots in words.
1
It’s late afternoon. I’m coordinating a writer’s workshop for students in the Eurobodalla. The guest writer and my co-coordinators are staying in the caravan park between the beach and the entrance of the Tuross River. We are sitting around, eating and talking about the day and how we might need to change tomorrow. I’ve resisted this workshop: every time I began thinking about organising it a steel shutter came down in my mind. I could see it, and hear its clang: I couldn’t fathom why there was such resistance. Shortly after this I decide to retire.
2
It’s midday after heavy rain. We’re walking along the sand stretching from the Blackie’s caravan park to the outlet of the river when we see a crowd gathered. Of course we head along to sticky beak and discover a huge machine beginning to move the sand that has settled across the river mouth, raising the level of the lake and warming it to a smelly, and as far as fish are concerned death-dealing, 23°. Dolphins trapped inside are languishing. There’s quite a gathering from both sides, people we’ve known forever have walked across from the Tuross side, and old acquaintances gather on the Potato Point side. We chat, as the machine sets about its work. The people from the north are watching particularly carefully, because they need to cross back or face a very long walk home. But everyone paying close attention because we’re all there to see the dramatic moment of breach.
3
It’s the middle of a grey splattery-rainy day. This is the end of a morning of flood tourism. The other two members of the tour group are no longer interested and we’ve left them behind to walk home. We’ve already watched the river whirl over the bridge near J’s place and race under the bridge across the highway north of Bodalla. It’s been raining heavily for days and the Tuross is churning furiously as it empties floodwaters into the ocean. My Queensland son and I stand on the edge, watching the swirling fury, the waves coming back on themselves as river meets surf.
4
It’s a placid sunny day with a stiffish breeze as the eye of memory looks across the river opening to the lake and spots a sailing boat, a clumsy looking object, with a tarpaulin sail. It’s tacking and twisting, he manoeuvring, she sitting and looking apprehensive. J’s been a boatman since he was 7, I haven’t mastered nautical nonchalance, even if the lake is neither deep nor wide. But we’re skittering along and the speed becomes exhilarating,
5
Another day, mid afternoon. A group gathers, clustering in changing patterns. If you watch closely you’ll see that there’s an odd hybrid of familiarity and hesitation as people talk and move on. There’s a hint of the hippy in long hair and long skirts, and a sombreness that’s rare on a beach. Slowly you figure out that they’ve gathered to farewell someone. The groups fall silent and remain near a rocky outcrop while the family gathers out of sight and swirls the ashes of our friend into the water.
Places have their own histories, but they also acquire the history of people who visit. These are my ghosts, my remnants, my shadows, traces of my past. These are the shards of memory I take to One Tree Beach at daybreak.
As you might expect, if you visit this blog often, I spend an inordinate amount of time doting on rockface. This morning is no exception, although the stranded tree and the possibilities of silhouette also draw me, as does the encroaching golden light.
Once I’ve had my fill of the shady end, I head off into the morning light towards the mouth of the river, and sit on a log watching a woman far more daring than I clamber along the headland which will give her a view uninvaded by caravan parks.
Then I do my own tamer version of scramble and cross the piles of driftwood to explore a rocky outcrop.
The patterning of rock here is astonishingly diverse so I employ a modification of “every 20 steps a photograph” called “every step a photograph.” I can’t even limit myself to one every step. Fortunately the outcrop is not very large.
I stand in front of the lifebuoy (ring buoy, lifering, lifesaver, life donut, life preserver, lifebelt, kisby ring, perry buoy) and take in the view: out over a benign-looking sea to a low bank of cloud, and south towards the Potato Point headland.
As I walk back along the beach I feel a presence behind me, keeping pace. I’m briefly fanciful and imagine it’s ghosts from the past, but in fact it’s my inordinately long shadow.
One Tree Beach is at the mouth of the Tuross River in the township of Tuross Heads, north of Potato Point. Take the turnoff from the highway south of Moruya, and turn left when you reach a T intersection. The road takes you along the waterfront until you reach a car park marked by a single small pine: someone killed the grand pine and this one replaced it. There is a picnic area and a lookout and ramp access to the beach.
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Keep being a tame scrambler, that woman in the photo could so easily slide down and knock herself unconscious on the way. I love to see plants squeeze their way into tiny crevices to flourish, I wonder if they could populate those rocks. Like Jude I’m beside you and your words even more than your photos. I wish I could find such good ones.
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No danger of me being anything but a tame scrambler. You should see the ridiculous timid caution I exercise! She was feeling her way too. You want good words? You absolutely have them. Your poems are treasures with totally apt images and often unexpected telling words.
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Much as I love looking at your photos I find that I enjoy your words even more. Those first few remembrances simply pull me in. I find myself standing beside you.
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You are my favourite kind of reader. This is exactly what I would have hoped, to have you standing beside me. Thank you.
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My pleasure Meg 🙂
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Speaking of poetic!
I absolutely love the boat trip (#4) and all the emotions it entails. Your beautifully narrated story not only proves that travelling is a state of mind but also it shows the power of memory. That remembering is a skill; an exercise in beauty, goodness and above all making choices.
Your walks and the way you perceive nature have reminded me of the poem by A.R. Ammons “Corsons Inlet” :
https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems-and-poets/poems/detail/43073
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“Shards of memory” – is this Tish’s construct or has it been used before? – I love it, and I love your touch with the rocky mother Earth. I think you should have been a geologist.
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“Shards of memory” was mine!!! In the last paragraph of the intro. I’m glad you like it: I was pleased with the double sense of remnant and sharpness, because memories can bite.
A geologist would know what she was looking at. I just know rocks are beautiful and extraordinarily varied. I visited a kink zone yesterday, and I’m still not quite sure what I was looking at, despite a frantic google. I need someone with me who can point and colloquialise the technical prose of geologists, where every second word is a mystery.
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Of course it is yours. I am a silly woman, Meg. Sorry. No geologist could match your enthusiasm.
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You are definitely not a silly woman!! I probably nicked the phrase from somewhere else anyway. I was eager enough to claim it to be a thief.
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😆 and maybe some time in the future I’ll snatch it from you.
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The dark and then the light, Meg! I love those first wistful photos and was standing respectfully at the shoreline with the memory of loss, in all its forms. I have little time right now but I will return, lugging a heap of hugs. 🙂 🙂
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When we take pictures, we capture much more than the image, so looking back at an image often triggers the actual moment much more clearly that we would otherwise remember it. It’s like recording metadata but on a personal level. I enjoyed reading your metadata – it’s rare photographers think to do this.
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I’m supposed to write, with photos as a sideline. But photos are easier than recalcitrant words.
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Oh, this chimes in with my present thoughts of the past…wandering through North Wales at present! I love this idea of presenting glimpses of your past, as Tish says, shards of memory, along with some great snapshots of place. You certainly have an affinity with rocks…. A powerful post indeed.
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North Wales is a completely foreign country to me, so I’ll relish wandering with you
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Yes, I must present some images-in-words of my past…
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Shards of memory – each one with its own particular ‘edge’. A fine post, Meg.
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Thank you. Praise from you is praise indeed!
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But much deserved on your part 🙂
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Best yet of your beaches Meg. Many of the rock series would create a lovely artwork, to be framed or made into a card. Love them all. The colours and textures of the rocks are so varied, with their unpredictable configurations only serving to emphasise nature’s originality. Thank you for sharing.
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Thank you. I suspect dawn contributed to the particular beauty of this rock collection. That early light is unbeatable, as is the energy I feel before the day overtakes me. A photo every step really demonstrated the diversity of patterns. It will be fascinating emerging from this into city life! Not long now.
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Rockface deserves every moment you devote to it!
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I think so! I’m glad you agree. Makes me feel less self-indulgent.
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– memories etched in the stones and gathered in the lines of driftwood.
Some great photos here made all the richer by you telling us something of your personal history. This a powerful post that takes me out of my Monday morning irritations about neighbourhood noise and heavy southern skies threatening rain. There is something about your post that lifts me up to see the bigger picture. Thanks.
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I love the first sentence of your response. I encapsulates beautifully what I was trying to do in this post. Thank you for your favourable comment. I feared I was being a bit self-indulgent – after all I’m sort of documenting the beaches – but I was sick of same format every time, and looking for other ways to present my beaches. You’ve confirmed me in thinking beyond my formula – and inspired me too, might I say, by your own posts. Haibun is in my mind for a future one.
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Getting bored with a certain way of blogging is exactly why I started this new blog. It has be creatively engaging to bother doing it and really, the only limits to it are those we impose on ourselves. I like the new direction you are taking and will be interested to see how it develops. Haibun writing is very rewarding.
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Now I’m on my honour to proceed!
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I don ‘t want you to feel obligated. Creativity and blogging has come from the heart I think, not from obligation. It is easy to become a slave to your blog and the expectations of others though. I am really resisting that this time around but can feel the pressure already. It’s an odd thing – social media seems to exert a strange pull. I sometimes feel I am being compelled to share!
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